Friday, January 14, 2011

Are you an Urban Fantasy Heroine?

Are you an Urban Fantasy Heroine?  Recognizing the early signs can mean the difference between an exciting life filled with adventure and hot men, and a painful, early death.  Take this quick test to find out, and prepare accordingly.  (Check all that apply to you.)
  1. At least one of your parents is missing or unknown. 
  2. You own a mysterious familial artifact.  (Bonus points if it’s a weapon!) 
  3. You live in a city large enough to warrant an extensive public transportation system. 
  4. Two or more unreasonably attractive men are trying to get you into bed, and at least one of them has fangs/wings/fur/flippers/control issues. 
  5. You have fangs/wings/fur/flippers/control issues. 
  6. You get inexplicable painful/tingly feelings in your chest/hands/head.  (Not related to #4 above.)  (But bonus points if they intensify around #2.)
If you answered “yes!” to at least three of the above, you might be an Urban Fantasy Heroine!  In approximately five pages, your life is going to change forever.  You might want to stock up on painkillers and bandages.  Also, if you can figure out who your father is now, you'll save yourself from an unpleasant surprise around page 139.  

If you answered “yes” to less than three of the above, you might be an Expendable Side Character.  Do your best to get a transfer to a novel with less violence.  Good luck!


  1. My story just has 4 and 6. MAYBE 1, but her dad is divorced and moved away, not really missing?

    Ha, I took this post Really Seriously. It's a good post.

  2. Oh man. This list is awesome. I have a feeling I'm going to be coming back to this whenever I start a new manuscript. :)

  3. This was so funny! Missing one or both parents is almost always a sign of greatness, apparently. So take that, all you people from happy homes!

    Tara Maya
    The Unfinished Song: Initiate
    Conmergence: An Anthology of Speculative Fiction

  4. Thanks, guys! Jaimie, I think you get to count #1. And I'm realizing I should have included "magical powers" in #s 4 & 5. Maybe they count as "control issues"? ;)

  5. Too bad my missing grandfather's watch hasn't enabled me to attract a cadre of unreasonably handsome men.

  6. Maybe it just needs to be activated with the blood of a virgin vampire...

  7. Hi A.J. In order to show appreciation for the work you're doing on your blog, I've nominated you for the versatile blogger award.
    See it at this link:

    Pass it on and keep doing a good job.

  8. @Caryn: Thank you!

    @Liz: Aww, thanks so much! I love my fellow bloggers!